If someone were to ask you when International Women's Day is celebrated, you would probably say, without thinking for a long time, that it is on March 8th every year. This date is present in our imagination because, besides the meaning of struggle and resistance, International Women's Day has become a commercial date.

As the products aimed at the female public are the most varied and the most expensive, it is convenient that a capitalist society takes the chance to honor women with gifts on this day that should be a day of reflection. There are even a number of controversies about the act of giving gifts on this occasion.

But what if a person asked you when International Men's Day is celebrated? Perhaps you would take a little longer to answer, both because there is more than one date for the celebration and because this date has not become as commercial as International Women's Day is.

This does not mean, however, that men are being belittled by society; in fact, the spotlight is on them every day. They are praised for the work and discoveries they make, forgiven for the mistakes they make, and considered the main pillar supporting patriarchal society.

After all, this social group has conquered everything positive that society could offer, besides not being oppressed, right? Wrong! Next, learn why this date is so important for our development as a community!

What do we celebrate on Men's Day?

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International Men's Day is not, as many people think, a moment to praise the male figure built by patriarchy. It is not an occasion to celebrate the stereotypes linked to the male gender, such as domination, strength, invincibility, or heteronormativity.

If the purpose of the International Men's Day is not to celebrate everything that the macho society attributes to the image of these people, what is it for? First of all, this date is for reflection, just like the International Women's Day. We are not yet an egalitarian community, and we need to transform ourselves for that.

So it is necessary to recognize that men are not invincible, that they need to take care of their own health (physical and mental), that they must be held accountable for the mistakes they make, that they can love in countless ways, and that they do not sustain society alone.

This means that International Men's Day is an opportunity to combat the stereotypes associated with the male gender, so that men are able to break free from the standards of behavior and living imposed on them.

Based on this, we will value the good and respectful attitudes that men have, whether as fathers, children, lovers, friends, or workers. On the other hand, we will be able to point out what they can still improve in who they are, without seeing them as people who are above any flaws.

Welcoming man to create a new society

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When we refer to men in a society, as a social group, it is most common to think of rich white heterosexual men, who are within the stereotypes assigned to that gender. However, society is made up of a multiplicity of men.

Such a social group is also composed of black, yellow, indigenous, disabled, gay, trans, bisexual, asexual, fat, and poor men, for example. Although they are not oppressed because they are men, they may be discriminated against by a number of other factors.

It is through the understanding that men have weaknesses and pain that we provide them with a welcome. Even individuals who meet the standards imposed by patriarchy need help, so that they can be heard, free themselves from the pressure of society, and have the space to be who they are.

To promote this welcoming and connection with the true essence of each man, it is enough to delve into the Sacred Masculine. This movement aims to develop dialogues between men and an intense process of self-knowledge for each of them.

Through these conversations between men, they can share the anguish, insecurities, and pain they feel, without fear of judgments and stereotypes. Besides being more connected with each other, they will connect with who they are, recognizing themselves as humans, and no longer as superheroes.

As much as these characteristics should be present in all people, patriarchy associates them mainly with women. It's time to change that!

The education of youth against patriarchy

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The transformation of society can occur through men's initiative, since any person can change his or her own behavior at any point in life. However, if these men had learned some lessons early on, this process would be much simpler.

Therefore it is important that children and adolescents are already educated thinking about the society of the future, which will be built by them. Instead of growing up with toxic masculinity, they will learn that masculinity can be positive.

1) The importance of consent

Since patriarchy holds the idea that men have power over everything, even other people's bodies, it is essential to teach about the importance of consent. So show that there are limits to what one person can do to another, in any realm.

2) Health care

If men are not invincible, they need to take care of their own health, so encourage young men from an early age to have annual medical checkups, both for their physical and mental health. In this way, they will grow up with this care as a habit.

3) Expression of feelings and thoughts

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It is urgent that all people feel free to express what they think and feel, especially men, who are encouraged to hide it all. So show the need to dialogue, to show emotions, and to open up to other people, even accepting criticism.

4) Fight against violence

Violence is never the answer to anything. Nevertheless, patriarchy teaches that men must be aggressive if they want to get what they want. For this reason, educate through affection and understanding, pointing out the dangers of reproducing any kind of violence.

5) Recognition of the other

Life in society requires us to recognize realities and experiences that are different from our own, without judging them. Therefore, teach young people that there are many ways of existing in the world, and that we must respect all of them. Also, emphasize that we should not impose rules, beliefs, or ways of loving on others.

We celebrate the masculine in July and November

Now that you have expanded your knowledge about International Men's Day, all that remains is to find out when it is celebrated, and to do so, let's investigate the origins of the definition of this date.

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In 1999, a doctor named Jerome Teelucksingh, from Trinidad and Tobago, pointed out the need to alert men to the importance of taking care of their own health. Thus, the United Nations Organization (UNO) defined November 19th as International Men's Day.

It is also because of this that the Blue November campaign exists, which informs the male public about the care that they should take with their own bodies. One of the focuses of the campaign is the prevention of prostate cancer, which can affect these individuals.

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In many countries, the International Men's Day is celebrated on November 19, but in Brazil the celebration occurs on July 15, because in 1992 the National Order of Writers chose this day to praise the contributions of men to Brazilian society.

Taking into account all the information presented, we conclude that the International Men's Day is celebrated on July 15 in Brazil and November 19 in other countries. In both cases, the purpose of the celebration is to reflect on the role of men in society, deconstruct the toxic masculinity and pay tribute to the achievements of these individuals. So open yourself to be a better man every day!