You have probably heard the phrase "kindness begets kindness" or the one that says "treat people as you would like to be treated". Both are great ways to illustrate an action that does people a lot of good: reciprocity.

When a subject directs a positive act to someone, and that someone reciprocates in the same way, a connection is created there that cannot be undone. It is the beginning of a cycle of kindness, respect, and gratitude.

This is why so much is said about reciprocity, whether with strangers, family members, lovers, friends, or coworkers. To better understand this little word, which is so powerful in practice, learn what it means below.

You will find it in this article:

• What does reciprocity mean?
• What is a reciprocal feeling?
• How does reciprocity manifest itself in relationships?
• Reciprocities in love
• Reciprocity in Friendship
• Reciprocity in the family
• Reciprocity at work
• Benefits of practicing reciprocity
• How to practice reciprocity?
• Why can't we always act reciprocally?

What does reciprocity mean?

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Empathy, sorority, reciprocity... So many terms have appeared recently that it is difficult to understand what they really mean in real life. So what does reciprocity mean?

This word comes from the Latin word "reciprocus", which means "moving from one side to the other". Over time, it has taken on a new meaning: it is the practice of making exchanges between two parties with a view to mutual benefit. Here, the parties can be people, organizations, countries, companies, and so on.

In everyday life, this exchange is linked to the relationships between individuals. If someone pays you a compliment, the feeling is so good that you want to reciprocate with another one! Thus, a good deed generates another good deed in response. It is an agreement of give and take; it is a posture of correspondence, in which what you give to the other person comes back to you in the same proportion (for better or for worse).

Are you still struggling to understand what reciprocity is? Relax, because below you will see some examples that you know well!

What is a reciprocal feeling?

You may have heard that reciprocity is everything in a relationship. In general, people say this because it is from a reciprocal feeling that we can align our plans and expectations with those we love and talk about important matters knowing that the relationship is secure, for example.

A reciprocal feeling is one that builds up over time, especially when we think about reciprocity in relationships.

It is the reciprocal feeling that makes one person sure that another person feels the same way as they do about a relationship, whatever the type of relationship. Therefore, the reciprocal feeling can be positive or negative, as long as it is shared by two or more individuals.

In other words, even if two people find different ways to show their feelings for each other, they know that they love, like, dislike or hate each other to the same extent.

In the next topic, you will gain a practical understanding of what reciprocity in love is, by understanding how this feeling manifests itself in relationships.

How does reciprocity manifest itself in relationships?

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The truth is that human beings are conditioned to respond in the same way they are treated. If they receive kindness and respect, they return kindness and respect. It is like this with people you have just met, and also with those you have known for many years.

Therefore, reciprocity is all that drives and feeds all of a person's relationships, regardless of their area of life. When they find someone who corresponds to their actions, a link emerges. And you can call this link whatever you want: friendship, love, affection, complicity... Next, we will understand each one of them.

Reciprocity in love

In a love relationship, reciprocity is the key to a stable and lasting union. This is because it is only in dialogue and in the willingness to give back to the other what he or she offers that a relationship is sustained for years and years on end.

You may notice that when reciprocity is lacking, fights, arguments, wear and tear, estrangement, and even termination begin. If this happens, it is necessary to talk about the expectations that each one has, and then align everything so that both can be on the same rhythm, as much as possible.

If the relationship still doesn't improve, the best thing to do is to go your own way, opening yourself up to other people who are willing to give and receive with the same intensity.

Reciprocity in Friendship

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In a friendship relationship, the reasoning is the same, but since the individuals usually have several friends, differently from what happens in a love relationship, the pressure is lower, and things tend to flow more smoothly.

If your friend is happy about your achievements and is always ready to listen to your grievances when things go wrong, you are expected to do the same when it's his turn. Together, there is a mutual support that only strengthens the friendship.

That is why weeks, months, or years can go by without friends seeing each other. By the time they meet again, the feeling of partnership is the same as before, because they know they can count on each other, no matter the distance and the situation.

Reciprocity in the family

In the family, this feeling is even more natural. After all, how can a child not be grateful to his parents, who offered everything he needed from birth? And how can parents not have unconditional love for a child, who has changed the way they see the world, since the discovery of pregnancy?

The family bond is originally strong, but this does not mean that reciprocity should not be worked on daily in the home. It is necessary that everyone is open to listening, showing support at all times.

Even if there is disagreement (this is normal and happens in any family), it is essential to talk with love and understanding.

Reciprocity at work

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At work, relationships are usually a little more complicated, since there is a lot of competitiveness, stimulated by the company itself. Even so, there is room for reciprocity - and when it exists, the corporate environment tends to be much more pleasant.

When a boss encourages his employee to grow, and he strives to do so, there is a reciprocal relationship. When you treat a colleague well, and he remembers this when he finds out about a vacancy that is just like you, there is a reciprocal relationship. When a team helps each other towards a common goal, and everyone evolves, there is a reciprocal relationship.

And this is not just motivational talk, no. Reciprocity, besides nurturing healthy relationships, also brings numerous benefits, which we will discover next.

Benefits of practicing reciprocity

Even if you have a good attitude and the person doesn't reciprocate, rest assured that the universe will reward you in the best possible way:

• contributes to a better world;
• creates a lighter, healthier environment for all those around you, be they friends, companions, relatives, or co-workers;
• encourages giving back the good things that other people do without ulterior motives;
• encourages other people to help you, when needed, because they are motivated by gratitude;
• makes your bosses or superiors recognize your willingness to help in the corporate environment;
• shows the people around you that kindness really does beget kindness;
• It increases peace of mind, knowing that you are doing good to your neighbor.

Interesting, isn't it? However, you may be thinking "on paper, it's all beautiful, but in practice, how can I be more reciprocal with the people around me?" Read on to learn.

How to practice reciprocity?

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There are two things you must keep in mind if you want to practice more reciprocity in your life. The first is that true reciprocity only happens if the action is done spontaneously, without aiming for something in return. To be reciprocal, you must be from the heart, because reciprocity is not charged. Precisely because of this, there are situations in which reciprocity will not happen. This is where the second piece of advice comes in:Beware of expectations; goodness must be the sole focus of your action.

With this in mind, reciprocity will come naturally. Simple everyday gestures (like giving a compliment or buying a gift when the other person is feeling sad) are one way to stimulate this flow of compassion and respect.

However, beyond these one-off actions, you need to create habits that will make people want to reciprocate your kindness. These are:

1. Have empathy: Put yourself in the other person's place, so it will be easier to understand how they see your attitudes and what they would like to receive in return;
2. Express gratitude: Being grateful is also a way to reciprocate a good deed, and it stimulates the emergence of genuine bonds;
3. Learn to listen: Listen carefully to what the other person says, to better see what can be improved in your relationship;
4. Be responsible: If you want more reciprocity in a relationship, you must take responsibility for your actions and how they affect the other;
5. Dialogue: For the expectations of all involved to be met, honesty and sincerity are key;
6. Have respect: People feel, think and act in different ways, and respecting this is the first step to true reciprocation.

Based on all the tips above, it becomes much easier to put reciprocity into practice, and soon it will become a natural part of the way you relate to each other. But... what if it doesn't happen? Understand, in the next topic, where you might be going wrong.

Why can't we always act reciprocally?

Like any habit, reciprocity only comes after a while, with repetition, so in some situations you may not be able to follow it until it becomes part of your daily life.

This can happen when you put your beliefs and your values above everything else, without being able to see the problem through the eyes of the other. These elements are important in understanding the world, but they are not the only ones. Remember that the richness is in the differences - hence the need for empathy.

Another moment when we tend to leave reciprocity aside is when we put ourselves in a position very distant from the other, for example, when watching the testimonies of the victims of a tragedy on television. It's not because it doesn't affect us that the problem is inferior to ours. One day, it could be you there.

By the way, blaming the victims is another way of not practicing reciprocity. Can you say, with certainty, how you would act in a situation of extreme pressure? Probably not, right? So how are you able to judge someone who has lost his or her mind? It is necessary to strip yourself of prejudices before evaluating the other's action.

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Finally, it is also important to remember that reciprocity is not only limited to good deeds. Hate can also be reciprocated, when you dislike someone who also dislikes you. In a way, the feeling is there, but in a way that consumes both parties - and does not benefit them.

So, the tip is to pay attention to the way you treat your neighbor. As we have seen, it will come back to you in the same intensity. What do you choose to receive? Think about it.